Lessons learnt

alot of thots..tried sharing w some sis n bros but sumhow they seemed not attentive or able to identify wat i was sharg so kinda felt brushed aside..ended up quite quiet throughout dinner..cos i din wanna forget wat i was thinkg..juz remained reflective n waitg to go bk hall to blog..

a few things which struck me:

sub d: psalm 51: how God desires to hear our inner truths..how He delights in a broken n contrite heart..it's not abt the works we do n show on e outside but our heart's condition..whether we r truly honest w Him n ourselves or haf we created a facade whereby we do all the 'Holy' Christian stuff but remain stubborn n closed to the Holy Spirit?

But wat really struck me was the lesson He has been tryin to teach me the yest n today..cos when i did my QT last nite..i read Mark 7 on clean n unclean..I was reminded of it durin the sub d sharing by wenjiang..
"These ppl honour me w their lips but their hearts r far from me. They worship me in vain; their teachings r but rules taught by men. U haf let go of the commands o God n r holdg on to the traditions of men."~Mark 7:6b-8

N also "Nothing ourside a man can mk him 'unclean' by gg into him. Rather, it is wat comes our of a man that mks him 'unclean'.~Mark 7:15

It sorta ties in with wat was revealed to me durin corporate prayer too..so in all 3 instances, God was teachg me sth..tt our sins r forgiven as long as we confess them truthfully to Him. It all boils down to our heart condition..wat goes on in our inner thots..wateva it demons we r facing, we've gotta face them bravely n seek God's help in dispelling them fr our lives rather than escape n hide them away, thinkg tt if we dun acknowledge it, it wun bother us..but instead, we will feel tt nagging burden at the bottom of our hearts..tt sense of guilt tt we've sinned..

God doesnt wan to c us go church or b holy for the sake of doin it cos we're christians..but He wans to hear our inner thots..He wans to change us fr the inside out n not fr the outside in..no pt putting up a facade n deceiving ourselves tt we're right with God when we're in truth far fr Him!

Another thot: Pastor Jeff preached today abt the Ethiopian eunuch n Philip in e bk of Acts.He reminded us of the Grt Commission n encouraged us to tk tt step of faith to reach out to frens ard us..it sorta sparked tt passion in me again!but this time i really hope to trust in Him for the salvation of pre-believing frens..mayb cos i've grown up in a traditional church where evangelism wasnt popular..in fact i grew up thinkg tt all evangelism has sum cult-ish roots n tt we've gotta b careful of ppl who evangelise..but as i grow older n experience different churches n understand the Bible more..i realise tt there's nth Satanic abt evangelism.

Evangelism isnt abt tryin to win converts or forcing our ideas on others..but it is instead a way to spread the Good News--that Jesus died for our sins n has risen fr the dead!dun u think it'l b sad if u died b4 knowing such a Grt news!so tho i still haf some struggles w evangelism, i think God is slowly untying these knots tt i've tied in my heart n showg me the real meaning abt evangelism..

God also placed this seed in me..cos i've been thinkg o whether to return to HK aft graduation..it's really a dble edged sword..either way i noe i wld feel sad..but sumhow i felt impressed upon my heart a possibility of helping Hope HK..i've always been a v visionary person..i lyk to think big..but tho i hate to admit it, i've always felt "you xin wu li" (haf the heart but no strength)i feel inadequate n not well-equipped to carry out His work..sumhow i doubt tt i can carry through any plans..i can feel it in my heart tt God has sth big in store for me..but i still dunno wat..i still rem the prophesy my CGL durin Easter camp prophesised for me 3yrs ago..abt how God wld use me to accomplish sth big..i felt tt passion for missions rekindled..suddenly i felt tt mayb..juz mayb..i cld b lyk Philip n the Ethiopian man..how Philip chose to obey God's specific directions even tho he didnt know wat God's plans were for him. He juz followed God's directions to where he found the Ethiopian.wat followed was totally not told to him. He juz took the initiative to share the gospel w him, using the chance tt was laid b4 him..

sumhow i believe God will create an opportunity to reach out to others..we may not know wat His specific plans r for us..but if we pray n ask earnestly, He'l reveal in due time..all we need to do is obey..so juz lyk how i took tt step of faith to return to Sg tho i din know wat was in store for me, i do hope tt i wld b able to tk tt step of faith again when the time He calls me to do His work..i think these 3 yrs in Sg has been a mouldg season for me..i'm not perfect..there's so much things i've gotta learn..humility, forgiveness, patience, love,service..God doesnt change a person overnight..He tks time n pains to mould him/her..sumtimes i wished the process cld b faster but i noe everythg is in His own timing..i've gotta b patient..

yup so mayb perhaps aft exams then i'l talk to xingni or somebody abt this lil seed implanted in mi today..i'm excited to go plant a seed in HK..start a movement or a youth grp or sth..but yet i still feel inadequate n insecure cos i really dunno how to go abt doin it..it's too big scale!heh..but i believe i've juz gotta ctn to trust in His providence..to believe that w God, nth is impossible! "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!"~Phil 4:13

Prayer Point: Lord thank u for ur teaching n revelation into my life these past few days..Exams is here but i'm thankful tt although i spend so much time gg for service n prayer meet n fellowship, Lord, u haf taken tt stress away fr me n instead filled mi w the confidence of ur Promises n love!i pray agst a heart of complacency..as much as i noe u'l bless me, i pray tt i wun b complacent but ctn to study hard for my pprs..Lord i pray tt as i ctn to pray abt my decision whether to go bk HK, u'll reveal ur plans to me. U c my heart oh Lord. U c tt passion to serve. But Lord i pray tt u equip me with the knowledge n wisdom to understand ur Word n plans for me. I pray tt u'l ctn to mould me to the person u wan me to become. I pray agst sins n pride..i pray tt i'l haf tt courage to tk tt step of faith to reach out to my pre-believing frens..i thank u Lord for all the blessings u've bestowed on my life n i hope u'l ctn to bless my bros n sisters who haf been working hard for your glory too!thank u Father..Amen..

"The harvest is plentiful but the workers r few."~Luke 10:2

Oh another thing..i thank God for the chance to share more abt my life in Christ to Carol..it's amazing..but i was quite hyper n happy fr service today..then she asked me..do i always feel happy aft gg to church n i told her yes!she asked me again if there was any time i din feel happy aft gg church..or if i felt disappointed aft gg church. i thot abt it n replied her shortly aft "NO!" ppl or church yes but god no..the thing is when i go to church, it's not juz abt the ppl..it's abt spendg time worshipping God.

I think pre-believers when they c us gg crazy for God n so hyper etc, they cannot understand n think tt we're mad or it's cos of the fellowship or atmosphere..true..to a certain extent i muz admit these factors do add up to the emotional high we experience..but besides them, the most influential factor is actually the annointing of the Holy Spirit. IT has always been a difficult topic to broach cos others who haf not experienced the Holy Spirit wldnt understand..but simply put, the Holy Spirit reveals to us certain things we wanna noe or didnt understand..n He establishes n intercedes on our behalf a r/ship n bridge to connect us w God..tt joy of bein filled with the Spirit..God's love, understandg, grace, mercy, forgiveness is really difficult to describe..juz lyk how r we to describe sad or happy in words..only e person experiencg it can fully understand the feelg..

yar..so was v happy i was also able to pray for her pprs for nxt wk..she told me she felt lighter aft the prayer..it's gd to c a burden lifted fr a fren..cos she was experiencg exactly wat i haf been experiencg wheneva i pray n lift my burdens to the Lord!heh..it's tt joy i wanna share..not the religion..n truly..i believe tt as long as i tk tt first step, the seed is planted..whether or not e other party eventually chooses to accept this gift n believe in this supernatural experience n joy, it will all depend on His timing..yup so ctn to pray ba!!Believe n haf faith!:)PTL!